Harassment (at work)
Posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26: Previous Next
I did it; was bold and wore a ponytail to work (I'm a teacher) Everything was pretty cool until a colleague made a rude comment in front of some parents and staff about how next thing you know the boys will want to grow theirs long and start wearing do-rags (does she even know what a do-rag is?)Later in the day I called her on it and told her it was unprofessional, rude and it IMPLIED I was a bad role model for the students! Furthermore if I had made such a personal comment about her or any other woman there it could be considered harassment! Why do people think they can comment on our hair, when there opinion has NOT been asked for! She apologized and said she had only been joking. MY POINT EXACTLY; keep your comments and jokes about my hair to your dam self! The good news is that the same day another woman said it looked great and sexy! I ROCK!
Re: Harassment (at work)
Posted by Jude on October 18, 2003 at 04:12:06: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
lol. you have a great attitude about it. Yah, some people can be rude, but they may think they are just being clever. You put her in her place it seems. Your gonna get alot of comments, both bad and good. Just take both with a smile, and try and dismiss the bad ones. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, though they always seem to have a need to voice it no matter how innappropriate or misinformed it may be. Keep rockin' then.
Re: Harassment (at work)
Posted by Robert on October 18, 2003 at 06:23:22: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
I applaud your willingness to confront your colleague. This is the only way that people will be able to see their biases, and often even then they do not. I am also a teacher, and fortunately have not encountered this. Though I do imagine that some of my colleagues over the years have been uncomfortable about my hair. One male teacher used to "joke" with me about getting my hair cut like his (crew cut). Finally, after about the third round of such joking, I told him, with full smile on my face: "You know, I wore a crewcut for the first 15 years of my life. Been there and done that. Why not let your hair grow like mine?" He did not joke with me any more.
Robert
: I did it; was bold and wore a ponytail to work (I'm a teacher) Everything was pretty cool until a colleague made a rude comment in front of some parents and staff about how next thing you know the boys will want to grow theirs long and start wearing do-rags (does she even know what a do-rag is?)Later in the day I called her on it and told her it was unprofessional, rude and it IMPLIED I was a bad role model for the students! Furthermore if I had made such a personal comment about her or any other woman there it could be considered harassment! Why do people think they can comment on our hair, when there opinion has NOT been asked for! She apologized and said she had only been joking. MY POINT EXACTLY; keep your comments and jokes about my hair to your dam self! The good news is that the same day another woman said it looked great and sexy! I ROCK!
Re: Harassment (at work)
Posted by Justin on October 18, 2003 at 07:49:24: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
Extremely rude and out-of-place comment to humilate you in front of others. It would have been great if you had told her this IN FRONT of those that had to listen to her "Mouth-Off!"
Anyway, just another example of a person who has nothing better to do than to mind everyone elses business...........but her own! I wouldn't let her bother me...........but the humilation in front of others would. Uncalled for 100% and completely unprofessional.
Sorry you had to be attacked by such an "Educated FOOL!"
Keep it growin...........and good luck!
Re: Harassment (at work)
Posted by Brian on October 18, 2003 at 10:54:37: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
Nice job! You handled that situation like an adult which many people cannot do when they get frustrated.
I must ask you though, how long is your hair and would you say it is straight/wavy/curly? I find it interesting that many males with long hair that is straight get far less discrimination than those that are curly/wavy.
Cheers.
- Brian
Re: Harassment (at work)
Posted by Sorted on October 18, 2003 at 12:57:34: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Harassment (at work) posted by Brian on October 18, 2003 at 10:54:37:
: Nice job! You handled that situation like an adult which many people cannot do when they get frustrated.
Ditto - I wouldn't have had your restraint, I would have probably kicked off, which wouldn't have solved anything!
Re: the small minded
Posted by Hair Religion on October 18, 2003 at 12:28:35: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
Ahhh, the "next-thing-you-know" talk.
The next thing you know HER students will be going around outright insulting people and believing alarmist rhetoric that is based on little more than someone's personal, mean-spirited, limited world view and obivously rather uneducated opinions because of her influence on them.
Great qualities to see in a teacher.
Congrats!
Posted by FITMUS on October 21, 2003 at 00:38:54: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
And I commend you for not letting the co-worker walk all over you. Keep it up!
Agree with Her
Posted by Elizabeth Regina on October 21, 2003 at 18:28:16: Previous Next
In Reply to: Harassment (at work) posted by amphibman on October 18, 2003 at 01:59:26:
You handled it well Amphibman, you rightly corrected her away from the parents. She needed to be told she was out of line and you showed her the professional way to discuss it. However, as an alternative, go ahead and take it as a compliment. Let the boys emulate you if they want. She'd be hard pressed to reasonably explain why it would be a bad thing.
With my style I would have excitedly agreed with her on the spot, "Oh, I hope so too! Yes, they might get ideas and that would be fun to see more long hair." It has been my experience that people find it very difficult to be negative when they get so willfully misunderstood.
Elizabeth