Glad to find this board
Posted by Tim McDowell on December 19, 2000 at 08:14:09: Previous Next
Hello Everyone, My name is Tim. It can be so hard finding support in our society for males with long hair. I am also half lakota(Sioux). I believe in my religious practicious and will never cut my hair for a job. I have been discreminated many times for employment. The guy who
is in prison in Texas site was quite interesting to me. But he did have one fact wrong. He said Arizona passed a law or something to that effect about long hair in prison. I went to Jail last year in Phoenix, Arizona for DUI and was in lock down the whole time and never got any privelages and was racially discreminated verbally by the guards. I believe in doing everything I can to not give in to societys judgements and limitations just because I have long hair and am male. I will go where ever I have to live my way of life. I have always believed in independant thought and to question what I am taught by society. Somethings I agree with and others I do not. My mother is an example of the Native American boarding schools where they stripped her Native identity away. She doesnt like long hair on males but I tell her that I am living proof that the attempt to strip us Native Americans of our culture did not succeed and I will pass on my tribal traditions to my children. Just nice to get this stuff off my chest.
Tim
Re: Glad to find this board
Posted by john on December 19, 2000 at 16:02:23: Previous Next
In Reply to: Glad to find this board posted by Tim McDowell on December 19, 2000 at 08:14:09:
never give in to prejudice, don't even meet it half way, but be aware that your behavior is registering with people who have yet to judge you because of your hair. if you treat your detractors with respect this will make an impression on those who haven't yet drawn any conclusions about you. many of the longhairs i've encountered carry themselves with a certain arrogance- 'chip on their shoulder attitude' that's undoubtedly a result of being treated like crap by almost everyone. this behaviour helps create a negative image by 'educating' those who haven't made up their minds.
Re: Glad to find this board
Posted by BMC on December 20, 2000 at 02:29:46: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Glad to find this board posted by john on December 19, 2000 at 16:02:23:
I agree with a lot of what John said. I've been accused of having a chip on my shoulder quite a bit, because of how I've been treated
in the past, but I've been trying not to project this attitude and turn even more people off or reinforce the negative perceptions. But that definitely doesn't mean we should cave in to a problem when it is there either.
I've been lurking around this board for at least a year now and I think it's most interesting and helpful to see how other longhairs deal with the predjudice that's out there.
Acceptance of longhairs
Posted by Bill on December 20, 2000 at 10:04:05: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Glad to find this board posted by BMC on December 20, 2000 at 02:29:46:
: I agree with a lot of what John said. I've been accused of having a chip on my shoulder quite a bit, because of how I've been treated in the past, but I've been trying not to project this attitude and turn even more people off or reinforce the negative perceptions. But that definitely doesn't mean we should cave in to a problem when it is there either.
: I've been lurking around this board for at least a year now and I think it's most interesting and helpful to see how other longhairs deal with the predjudice that's out there.
I'm so happy to be a longhair that friends say I'm a lot more fun to be around than I was before growing my mane, and people I work with see me as far more self-confident. Both these things have great value in social circles and in the workplace. See, I never did feel right with short hair. On the other hand, I do avoid some environments where I know I would not be welcome.
All minorities have this problem. In our case, one can choose to be among our minority or not, but that does not change anything except for that one thing - we can decide to stay or leave. Looking at these pros and cons is just what we all do, when we decide to grow and keep our hair. In my case, having traveled both roads, I know I will forever be a longhair.
Something that makes a big difference in how I am perceived is what I do with my appearance other than my hair. Most people seem to accept "one thing" that is different but not more. For example, a white kid can wear scruffy clothes and people will read him as just casual, if a black kid does that people will read him as a criminal. This is not fair, but that is how many people read others.
Knowing this, one can decide to play his "one thing" card on having a wild and woolly mane, if he chooses, and trim his beard neatly and wear clean, new, and tidy clothes. When I take this route I find the reactions of people vary widely depending on these non-long-hair attributes. Grow my beard out a bit and wear a faded t-shirt and old jeans? First impression reactions from people go way down. Wear the same exact type of clothes but new and crisp ones, and trim the beard? The difference in how many people just say "good morning" on the sidewalk is incredible.
Playin' my cards on my mane, and celebratin' it long!
Bill
Re: Acceptance of longhairs
Posted by Tim McDowell on December 22, 2000 at 18:43:42: Previous Next
In Reply to: Acceptance of longhairs posted by Bill on December 20, 2000 at 10:04:05:
: : I agree with a lot of what John said. I've been accused of having a chip on my shoulder quite a bit, because of how I've been treated in the past, but I've been trying not to project this attitude and turn even more people off or reinforce the negative perceptions. But that definitely doesn't mean we should cave in to a problem when it is there either.
: : I've been lurking around this board for at least a year now and I think it's most interesting and helpful to see how other longhairs deal with the predjudice that's out there.
: I'm so happy to be a longhair that friends say I'm a lot more fun to be around than I was before growing my mane, and people I work with see me as far more self-confident. Both these things have great value in social circles and in the workplace. See, I never did feel right with short hair. On the other hand, I do avoid some environments where I know I would not be welcome.
: All minorities have this problem. In our case, one can choose to be among our minority or not, but that does not change anything except for that one thing - we can decide to stay or leave. Looking at these pros and cons is just what we all do, when we decide to grow and keep our hair. In my case, having traveled both roads, I know I will forever be a longhair.
: Something that makes a big difference in how I am perceived is what I do with my appearance other than my hair. Most people seem to accept "one thing" that is different but not more. For example, a white kid can wear scruffy clothes and people will read him as just casual, if a black kid does that people will read him as a criminal. This is not fair, but that is how many people read others.
: Knowing this, one can decide to play his "one thing" card on having a wild and woolly mane, if he chooses, and trim his beard neatly and wear clean, new, and tidy clothes. When I take this route I find the reactions of people vary widely depending on these non-long-hair attributes. Grow my beard out a bit and wear a faded t-shirt and old jeans? First impression reactions from people go way down. Wear the same exact type of clothes but new and crisp ones, and trim the beard? The difference in how many people just say "good morning" on the sidewalk is incredible.
: Playin' my cards on my mane, and celebratin' it long!
: Bill
Thanks for all the advice everyone. The points that were brought up
were interesting and made me do some thinking. I just wanted to so I appreciate the efforts by all who responded.
Tim
Re: Glad to find this board: Indian
Posted by Jerome on January 21, 2001 at 13:31:21: Previous Next
In Reply to: Glad to find this board posted by Tim McDowell on December 19, 2000 at 08:14:09:
Tim,
I encourage you to keep up with your Indian heritage and remain true to your religion!! Keep it up!