This is to Jin
Posted by Treyn on July 04, 2002 at 14:04:16: Previous Next
First off, your hair looks great and I am currently envious (for the next year or so anyway). Now, this is in reference to you and your mother. I myself could never imagine myself in a situation where I felt hatred towards my mother. Not over hair or anything else. The fact is, my mother sees me for me, and not for who she may want me to be, whatever that may be. My suggestion to you, if for your own dignity alone, is to never hate your mother over this, but also to not give in on the hair issue either, for with her love to you, this should not matter. A mothers heart can be broken on the issue simply by how you handle it verbally. Don't let yourself resort any further to yelling and anger even if she does, it only makes things worse. Show her you have self control in the matter. Here is where you will get the upper hand in the situation. In a very heart felt and kind manner, tell your mother you love her deeply and that you wish she loved you for you alone and not for who she thinks you should be. Tell her that no matter how she treats you on the matter she could never make you hate her. Tell her that you are comfortable with who you are and that if she truly loved you she would be too. Tell her that a MOTHER, of all people, should love her son for what's inside of him, not the outside. After all this, no matter what she says, affirm to her again that you love her, and then go on with your life knowing YOU had the right attitude. Sooner or later your mother will come around. You can stand firm and not hate. You can be done for a while socially with your mother and not be done with her in your heart. For if it comes to this, that will be truly a tragidy. GOD BLESS and good luck.