what once was
Posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47: Previous Next
Before cutting.
Re: what once was
Posted by Enrique on April 03, 2004 at 00:33:53: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
do you have any 'after' pix?
Re: what once was
Posted by eric on April 03, 2004 at 02:46:39: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
Stanley,
I'm still in mourning over the cutting of your hair. I'm also very confused as to your religious beliefs as stated in the interview on your website. It seems to me that the length of hair is not the issue. The moral dimension would probably come in in that longer hair on a guy makes him more attractive and could lead others into temptation. So, if you're worried about religious stuff, then keep it short and you won't be tempting anyone to sin. However, even when your hair was at it's longest it looked great and was just as tempting no matter the length. Thake it from one who is very tempted by your longer hair! I hope I'm going to be tempted more in the future!
In clarification
Posted by StanleyBey on April 03, 2004 at 10:46:22: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: what once was posted by eric on April 03, 2004 at 02:46:39:
I didn't post the picture as a way of saying I made the wrong decision to cut. I didn't. It was the necessary thing to do and I don't regret it.
However, it doesn't change the fact that I love long hair and that I thoroughly enjoyed my longer hair. That is part of me and it's not going to change. I was hoping the interview on my site would further elucidate my reasons for the cut.
I just thought I'd share a pic here of what my hair was like and a look that I thought was interesting.
Re: what once was
Posted by ColdFlu on April 03, 2004 at 08:26:26: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
Yep, what once was is no longer. Remember that you made that decision and enjoy your buzz!
?
Posted by Redleader on April 04, 2004 at 04:33:42: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
....and your point is?
!!
Posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 09:24:17: Previous Next
In Reply to: ? posted by Redleader on April 04, 2004 at 04:33:42:
: ....and your point is?
Friend,
Perhaps you didn't notice my addendum below. I just felt like sharing a pic of when my hair was longer. This is the longhair board, right?
Did you take offense to this?
Re: !!
Posted by Redleader on April 10, 2004 at 14:59:52: Previous Next
In Reply to: !! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 09:24:17:
No, sorry if I sounded harsh. I just didn't really understand why you posted the picture. Since you cut your hair, and you posted under the somber title "What once was", it appears as if you are really torn abuot loosing your hair and your unwillingness to grow it long. Nevertheless, good luck on whatever hair path you choose.
Why we don't get it!
Posted by Sorted on April 04, 2004 at 10:41:43: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
: Before cutting.
Stanley, I thing there's something that your missing... Whilst we all understood that you cut your hair because you didn't want it to become an issue with your faith. None of understand why hair and faith should ever come into conflict.
There are so many stories in the bible that offer differ points of view, hair is just one of them. For every story that says that men should cut their hair short there is another that suggests LongHair is favored.
Personally regarding the passage from Paul to the Corinthians - I think this is just a personal interjection from Paul because he was Bald and envious of men who had a head of hair. (This much as been suggested by biblical scholars.)
In your interview you basically say that your not going to grow you hair long because your worried about crossing your God - such a suggestion also implies that all of us who are growing our hair could be crossing our god. (After all we share the same God.) How do you think this makes others feel? Yet you wonder how you could have caused offence?
If its not a question of what's right and wrong according to God, then its a question of whats right or wrong according to the mere mortal organisations spreading his word. And no such organisation is perfect. So many of us conclude that you cut your hair not for yourself, but to satisfy others.
This is not a philosophy that anyone else on the board believes in or can accept. This is why people are generally unsympathetic.
From one self confessed hair obessive to another - You have to get this out of your system, otherwise it will plague you for the rest of your life. Then one day (probably just due to sods law.) you'll get to Heaven and everyone will have waist lenth hair.
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by Theron on April 04, 2004 at 15:36:36: Previous Next
In Reply to: Why we don't get it! posted by Sorted on April 04, 2004 at 10:41:43:
Hi Stanley :-)
I also read your interview. I am a Christian, too, so I want to address you now from that point of view. As a Christian, I understand how intense the pressure can, at times, be from other members of your faith when they feel you are doing something different than what is written in the Word. That said, please consider this: In my experience, one of the favorite past times of many fellow Christians, especially those who are heavily involved in their faith through organized religion, is finger pointing and judging of their own for what they consider to be some trangression, of the Word. This is unfortunate, because no man walk perfectly. Please always remember, you are not under their authority. Your walk is with God, thru Jesus, and it is the Lord who justifies us through grace before the Father. "For by grace ye are saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: not of works, least any man should boast," Ephesians 2:8-9. Those who judge you, or put pressure on you because of your long hair would be wise to remember Jesus words: "Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall me measured to you again," Matthew 7:1-2. While it may be a favorite past time of well meaning fellow Christians to judge each other, they should also consider: "Who are thou that judgest another man's servant? To his own master he standeth or falleth. Yea, he shall be holden up: for God is able to make him stand," Romans 14:4.
My message to you is simple...if you want to grow your hair, do it, and if you get pressure from those of your faith kindly point out to them that you are not under their authority. It is your faith that will save you, and the length of your hair will not affect that. "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God," Romans 3:23. "For we through the Spirit wait for the hope of righteousness by faith," Galatians 5:5.
Anyhow, I hope this gives you something further to consider.
Theron :-)
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 19:50:24: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by Theron on April 04, 2004 at 15:36:36:
Hi Theron,
Thanks for your reply. I especially appreciate the generous use of Scriptures throughout.
To all: I apologize for the possible misconstruing of my post. I am at peace. At least relative peace. I can still say I would like long hair and not have it and still be at peace because there are more important things than hair and I fully realize this.
I accept ALL scripture as inspired of God. This obviously includes 1 Corinthians. What Paul wrote was inspired by Almighty God.
Some points that have influenced me:
1 Corinthians 8:12, 13: "But when you people thus sin against your brothers and wound their conscience that is weak you are sinning against Christ. Therefore if food makes me brother stumble, I will never eat flesh at all, that I may not make my brother stumble."
1 Corinthians 6:7: "...Why do you not rather let yourselves be wronged?..."
While neither scripture is directly talking about hair, there are principles that can be taken from both. It is true that as Christians we have a freedom through Christ and that our consciences should be our guides. At the same time, it is a serious thing to stumble others. In my situation, I would be doing this if I grew my hair long. So, I would rather be 'wronged' in the sense of giving up something I personally want in this case. I would also not want to create divisions.
It is certainly true that we've all sinned and that there is no possible way to earn salvation - it being an undeserved kindness from God. It is also true that only God can pass final judgment on an individual. I do not feel judged adversely. I also do not feel that I am trying to earn my salvation in this way. This is just my conscience directing me in this way at this time.
I do not post these things as condemnation or judgment of anyone here! Please don't take it that way. I am only explaining my position.
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by curt on April 04, 2004 at 21:13:40: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 19:50:24:
[b]: At the same time, it is a serious thing to stumble others. In my situation, I would be doing this if I grew my hair long. So, I would rather be 'wronged' in the sense of giving up something I personally want in this case. I would also not want to create divisions.: [/b]
How is growing your hair long for the world to see any different than posting previous pictures of your long hair..? Are both not stumbling blocks to entice others to do as you wish not to do...?
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 21:27:57: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by curt on April 04, 2004 at 21:13:40:
My hair, at least by standards here, was not really that long at all in those pictures. I wore it that length in my congregation and no one said anything. It would have become an issue if I had continued to grow it longer than that.
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by Theron on April 04, 2004 at 22:33:12: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 21:27:57:
: My hair, at least by standards here, was not really that long at all in those pictures. I wore it that length in my congregation and no one said anything. It would have become an issue if I had continued to grow it longer than that.
Hi :-)
I continue to think that it is a shame that hair length should become an "issue" with fellow Christians, for all the reasons stated in my origional post. We, Christians, have enough to focus on in our own walk, without making "issues" of what is happening with another person on theirs --Jesus really did not give us the authority to do that to each other.
You mentioned in a previous post not allowing it to grow long out of concern that it may cause someone else to stumble. Hmmmmm.....maybe growing it long would serve as a good lesson to other Christians in reminding them that we each have our own personal walk, and that we should not get side tracked on that walk by spending time judging others. Every Christian can get side tracked by focusing on what someone else is doing...part of their growth is learning that is not their place.
I am sorry, but I think you are giving way too much influence and power to others, over something you want to do, but this is your choice, so I respect it and you.
Theron :-)
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by ColdFlu on April 05, 2004 at 06:50:39: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 21:27:57:
: My hair, at least by standards here, was not really that long at all in those pictures. I wore it that length in my congregation and no one said anything. It would have become an issue if I had continued to grow it longer than that.
Hmmm, interesting statement. So instead of keeping it trimmed to that length, you decided to buzz it all off. Yeah, your making more sense each time you write.
Christ must be really miffed!
Posted by Sorted on April 05, 2004 at 12:00:11: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 21:27:57:
: My hair, at least by standards here, was not really that long at all in those pictures. I wore it that length in my congregation and no one said anything. It would have become an issue if I had continued to grow it longer than that.
I think you need to watch a film called Dogma - (Remember it?) OK it was done in Jest and was not meant to be taken seriously, but Chris Rock's character Rufus but across an excellent point.
>>Christ had a Good Idea - he gave us a good idea... whether he truely was the son of god or not - he set down some excellent values and a great basis for living your life. But we were the fools who developed a belief structure out it.
If everyone had just stuck to the idea, rather than getting wrapped up in controlling others then Religion would had never lead to any Wars, it would not have lead to Islamic or Christian Fundamentalism, it would not have lead to hatred of others.
If heaven exists then I can tell you, if I were Jesus Christ, then I would really miffed that I died for everyone down here... what a bunch of loosers!
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by Hair Religion on April 05, 2004 at 13:21:19: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: Why we don't get it! posted by StanleyBey on April 04, 2004 at 19:50:24:
>>It is certainly true that we've all sinned and that there is no possible way to earn salvation - it being an undeserved kindness from God. It is also true that only God can pass final judgment on an individual.
No, it is not true. I have not sinned. Sin, undeserved kindness, judgement and salvation are concepts of some religions, ALL of which are based on myth. I do not believe in myths and I do not accept the idea of sin. If you cannot show some proof of your god then worship it if you want but do not assume that everyone else is beholding to those ideas as well.
I think that this may related to your hair issue. Every religion and it's adherents interpret their belief systems according to what works for them regardless of how others interpret it or even it's original intent/meanings (not all of which were practical or even good as we now know). So trying to appease or keep some from stumbling over a narrow personal interpretation of someone else's interpretation of a belief system that is rooted in ancient myth becomes a futile excercise at some point. The praise that one gets from making the attempt though can be a bit addictive. Just remember that people tend to make it up as they go and you also have to learn as you go about people and their tendencies, good and bad.
Just because you want something doesn't mean that it's wrong, maybe you are just hanging out with the wrong crowd (or at least folks who stumble too easily).
Re: Why we don't get it!
Posted by Malley on April 04, 2004 at 16:37:15: Previous Next
In Reply to: Why we don't get it! posted by Sorted on April 04, 2004 at 10:41:43:
: From one self confessed hair obessive to another - You have to get this out of your system, otherwise it will plague you for the rest of your life.
I agree!
To put so much time & energy into documenting (with way too much fascination) the process of growing one's hair out and then buzzing it, into dealing with whether one's hair is long or short, into whether it fits or doesn't fit one's religion, into whether it will offend or not offend one's peers is, yes, truly "obsessive"!
Re: what once was
Posted by High Priestess on April 04, 2004 at 14:51:50: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
You have a gorgeous face so no matter how you wear your hair you look good. You are lucky that way.
I like the picture of your completely shaved head.
I actually prefer men to have a shaved head than to have a shorter hair style.
I love long hair on guys but I really don't like shorter hair cuts.
Maybe it is just the extremist look that a shaved head or long hair makes on a man.
I have a personal problem with conformity. hehe!
Re: what once was
Posted by Big L on April 09, 2004 at 06:43:54: Previous Next
In Reply to: what once was posted by StanleyBey on April 02, 2004 at 22:48:47:
: Before cutting.
Dear Stanley
I've read all the posts and the interview that you 'granted'(I'll be honest, I'm not even sure about the authenticity of the interview). This is tough love - not a flame : you are so f****d up - PLEASE GET SOME HELP !
At the very least, you appear to have a form of OCD. This constant growing then cutting also looks like a mild form of self-harming ; just as your hair starts to look like you want it, you destroy it.
I know it's flawed thinking to project one's own experiences onto others (I'm in recovery from alcoholism, anorexia and OCD) but sometimes, it takes one to know one. I genuinely believe that there's a lot going on with you that is nothing to do with hair at all - your hair obsession is just a symptom of something else.
Maybe I've barked up the wrong tree here, in which case I apologise. If I haven't, please consider what I've said.
With very best wishes,
Laurence