threats from roommates
Posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37: Previous Next
Over the past few months I've been receiving threats from two of my roommates. They say they will cut my hair. I tell them that will never happen, but they seem very aggressive and angry and I fear they may actually attempt it. If they forcibly cut my hair can I have them arrested? I would want charges pressed as it took me two long years to grow my hair to this length. One of my roommates has a history of violence. They are both complete jerks and I should have ended our friendship at the first signs of their apparent psychological problems. These guys are actually mad at me because I don't hang out with them anymore. I quit hanging out with them after numerous insults and other unfriendly behavior was directed toward me. These guys don't realize that it's not just a joke if you do it all the time. I doubt any rational person would find their behavior the slightest bit amusing.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by nWo_Slapnut on May 08, 2003 at 04:06:44: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
: If you don't foresee yourself finding new partners anytime soon, my suggestion is to clearly and explicitly state just what you told this board: That if your body, be it your hair or otherwise, is violated without your permission, you will press charges without remorse. To really come off serious, you may want to take a few photos of your hair as is in the event that you may need evidence of what was lost (Hopefully you won't need that evidence, but they might deter him from violating you).
If you tell them...
Posted by LucksKind on May 08, 2003 at 07:06:49: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
If you tell them things like: "It will never happen." they could
take it as some sort of a dare.
Instead you might want to ask them something like: "WHY are YOU
so damned concerned with MY hair?"
OR maybe: "Mind your own business."
OR: " *^%@%#! "
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by Timothy on May 08, 2003 at 08:02:47: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
Don,
Life is way too short. These guys are NOT your friends - they don't even make good roommates. I suggest you "downsize" as in finding a place (smaller) to move to, one you could afford on your own. You also need to "downsize" the people in your life. These guys don't deserve you; cut them loose and move on.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 08:06:35: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
Aug 1st I will be moving into my new apartment, minus loser roommates. Can someone please tell me if it's possible to press charges in the event that they forcibly cut any of my hair.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by T a r i k h on May 08, 2003 at 09:33:35: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 08:06:35:
I dont know how the legal system of your place works, but it depends on the attitude of the cops. At my place, the foolish cops would think that I was the guilty guy. The stereotype is that long hairs are trouble makers and that they started it.
If I were you, I would tell these room-enemies that if they touched my hair, I would get violent and they might end up injured or dead. Show them that you are not joking.
I`ve got frineds telling me the same things. But as soon as I chnage my attitude and tell them that my hair means a lot to me and I get srious, they just shut up. Impose yourself.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by 4everlong on May 08, 2003 at 09:32:01: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
: Over the past few months I've been receiving threats from two of my roommates. They say they will cut my hair. I tell them that will never happen, but they seem very aggressive and angry and I fear they may actually attempt it. If they forcibly cut my hair can I have them arrested? I would want charges pressed as it took me two long years to grow my hair to this length. One of my roommates has a history of violence. They are both complete jerks and I should have ended our friendship at the first signs of their apparent psychological problems. These guys are actually mad at me because I don't hang out with them anymore. I quit hanging out with them after numerous insults and other unfriendly behavior was directed toward me. These guys don't realize that it's not just a joke if you do it all the time. I doubt any rational person would find their behavior the slightest bit amusing.
Tell your roommates that the "Haircut Bandit" in California got EIGHT YEARS for giving unwanted haircuts to women/girls. Ask your roommates, "Do you want an EIGHT YEAR prison sentence for forceably cutting your hair?". OR, ask them are they members of the Teleban from Afganistan? The Teleban would sieze any man who they felt needed a haircut and dragged him off to get one. Tell them you will report them to the the authorities (police) if they are. Besides, what country do your roommates think they are in, America (Where we have the FREEDOM to EXPRESS ourselves-and THAT'S in writing)?
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by mookie on May 08, 2003 at 13:15:04: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by 4everlong on May 08, 2003 at 09:32:01:
how do you know Don lives in America? (sorry, if that seems a silly question)
:Besides, what country do your roommates think they are in, America (Where we have the FREEDOM to EXPRESS ourselves-and THAT'S in writing)?
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by ItsaMe on May 09, 2003 at 17:02:20: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by 4everlong on May 08, 2003 at 09:32:01:
: Besides, what country do your roommates think they are in, America (Where we have the FREEDOM to EXPRESS ourselves-and THAT'S in writing)?
Really? I can't find a COUNTRY named "America" on my globe.
And FREEDOM of speech in the USA ? Ha!
Just criticise G.W. Bush or the "American" way of life, or just say "Communism actually isn't THAT bad", and KA-CHING everybody will hate you, you may get fired - and you'll surley get censored.
So much for that.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by GerBer on May 09, 2003 at 17:45:46: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by ItsaMe on May 09, 2003 at 17:02:20:
: And FREEDOM of speech in the USA ? Ha!
: Just criticise G.W. Bush or the "American" way of life, or just say "Communism actually isn't THAT bad", and KA-CHING everybody will hate you, you may get fired - and you'll surley get censored.
OK....
If you lived in a communist country, you probably would not be able to post to this board. If by some chance you were able to post here, your posts would not only be censored but all you internet activity would be monitored and scrutinized by the government.
The last time I checked, the United States was the most free nation in the world. You DO have the right to CONSTRUCTIVELY critisize the president. You DO have the right to INTELLIGENTLY debate the different freedoms and restrictions granted to us here in america. As for saying "communism actually isn't that bad" ....yeah, you would probably make alot of people upset by saying that because it is a pretty inflamatory thing to say. Just go ahead and trying living in a communist country and then tell me "communism is not that bad"
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by RedRocker on May 11, 2003 at 03:55:30: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by GerBer on May 09, 2003 at 17:45:46:
"Just criticise G.W. Bush or the "American" way of life, or just say "Communism actually isn't THAT bad", and KA-CHING everybody will hate you, you may get fired - and you'll surley get censored."
And where has any of this happened? Who has gotten fired? [that news reporter got fired for aiding the enemy by spreading Iraqi [govt] propaganda -- that is equivalent to TREASON -- he wasn't merely exercising his freedom of speech]. So far, Dan Rather hasn't gotten fired. Of course, I wouldn't have hired him partially because of that lame newscaster [short hair] "style" (LOL).
Disagreeing with someone's point of view is quite far from hate. I really don't care who you like, hate or dislike. You are free to speak your mind. However, I don't have to listen -- you DON'T have the right to be heard. I am also free, to choose not to go to certain movies or listen to certain music artists if I disagree with their opinions. That IS freedom.
Certain communist countries won't even allow long hair [as was mentioned]. Some force you to grow a beard. Hmmm. I don't recall seeing a SINGLE long-haired Iraqi during the war coverage. Not ONE. Aside from the other atrocities [SP?] -- I would definitely HATE that.
One final note. There are limits to free speech when it can [or will] endanger other people's lives [as in the reporter's case]. You can't yell "FIRE!" in a crowded theater, BTW.
Thanks for listening [well; reading] -- but you do have the choice NOT TO.
A fine line...
Posted by Mark Ellott on May 11, 2003 at 06:11:06: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by RedRocker on May 11, 2003 at 03:55:30:
Freedom of speech and the restrictions imposed because of national security is always a fine balancing act. Freedoms bring with them responsibility - and none more so than that of free speech. For an example of that responsibilty being ignored, look at the newspapers...
Is the USA truly the land of the free? Hmmm, you at least have a written constitution that says so. However, what restriction on those freedoms are imposed by peer pressure which is far more insidious than that imposed by government? The UK is no different.
Would I rather live in the UK or USA than, say, the middle east? Silly question... ;-)
Re: A fine line...
Posted by RedRocker on May 11, 2003 at 13:32:20: Previous Next
In Reply to: A fine line... posted by Mark Ellott on May 11, 2003 at 06:11:06:
I agree. I would say "more free" than many other nations. Take care.
Re: threats? get a copy!
Posted by Hair Religion on May 08, 2003 at 15:02:56: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
Ask them if they would mind if you got a written statement or voice recording of their threat so that the legal process will be more streamlined in the event that they do make good on their threats.
Tell them that it would be for their own protection as well so that you couldn't make up anything that they didn't actually say once the case was in the court system.
(little sobering dose of reality)
Re: threats? get a copy!
Posted by klassh on May 09, 2003 at 14:24:32: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats? get a copy! posted by Hair Religion on May 08, 2003 at 15:02:56:
well thats a little silly, thats just being smug, and will probably get a punch to the mouth.
Some times you gota quit hiding behind the rules and deal with it yourself. If they cant respect you, then how do you expect to solve anything.
to clerify
Posted by klassh on May 09, 2003 at 14:27:58: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats? get a copy! posted by klassh on May 09, 2003 at 14:24:32:
that would work againsed a buisiness, or employer. Not to a roomate or a friend.
Re: to clerify
Posted by Mark Ellott on May 09, 2003 at 17:12:39: Previous Next
In Reply to: to clerify posted by klassh on May 09, 2003 at 14:27:58:
: that would work againsed a buisiness, or employer. Not to a roomate or a friend.
Irony, it seems, is missed here. The point is that the request would never be made with an expectation of compliance.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by John Doe on May 08, 2003 at 21:05:32: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
The best war is none at all! If you can move, do it. I had some friends in high school who acted the same way your friends act now. I found new friends who are more outgoing, supportive, and are interested in accomplishing something with their life. I still have the "new" friends today, some 25 years later. And, the old "friends"...one ended up in prision for armed robbery and attempted rape, and I don't know or really care obut the others. Surround yourself with people who support you, even if they don't necessarily agree with you!
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by RedRocker on May 08, 2003 at 21:24:05: Previous Next
In Reply to: threats from roommates posted by Don on May 08, 2003 at 02:10:37:
The first thing I would do, is get right in their faces and "lay down the law". If the one already has a history of violence and has been arrested before [for that], I doubt he would want to try anything and end up back in jail. I would tell them that if they touch my hair -- they'll get a "big surprise" next time they wake up [they have to sleep sometime].
Second, I would report it to the police [make a report]. I'm not sure whether you should tell them about the "haircut" threat or not. Make something up [I know that sounds bad]. Tell them something about threats of violence against you. Insist on a report.
You're already doing my third suggestion by moving.
This is precisely why I don't have roommates anymore [not hair problems -- just general BS]. I've lived alone the past 5 years. I did have a girlfriend living with me for a while [they can be a pain to put up with too]. In fact, I just kicked her out 'cause I was tired of her crap (very long story).
Anyway, if you stand up for yourself and be aggressive, these bullies [obviously brainwashed by society] will tend to back off -- at least a little.
I wish you luck.
Re: threats from roommates
Posted by Rick on May 09, 2003 at 07:44:07: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by RedRocker on May 08, 2003 at 21:24:05:
: The first thing I would do, is get right in their faces and "lay down the law". If the one already has a history of violence and has been arrested before [for that], I doubt he would want to try anything and end up back in jail. I would tell them that if they touch my hair -- they'll get a "big surprise" next time they wake up [they have to sleep sometime].
And get yourself killed. Hey, man. This is the real world, not some
movie. People with a history of violence and arrests for violence
are dangerous.
Alternatively, you can congratulate yourself on how you stood up
for yourself as you lie there on that hospital bed with tubes
coming out of you.
Get out of there! Go to a motel or rent a room in someone's house
for the next 3 months. Demand the school move you to an unused
room. Don't waste your time going for some
dumb symbolic victory. Cutting your hair is violence and it
might not stop there.
My opinion
Posted by RedRocker on May 09, 2003 at 21:25:10: Previous Next
In Reply to: Re: threats from roommates posted by Rick on May 09, 2003 at 07:44:07:
I was speaking from how I would handle it [I'm fairly large at 6'1" and 220lbs]. I've been in several situations like this. Victims are usually the "passive" people -- the ones that APPEAR to be weak, although they are probably just nice people.
If you show some strength, it will usually deter the aggressors in this type of situation. You don't need to curse and yell at them. You can simply tell them how it's "going to be" in a calm and confident tone. Look them straight in the eyes.
It's VERY unlikely that this person is going to kill. Most bullies like this are actually cowards inside. If this person IS crazy -- he would have already attacked, instead of voicing himself. It's my opinion that he's trying to see how far he can push; until the receiver pushes back. Besides that, one reason he is angry [probably the only reason]; is that Don [if I remember correctly] will no longer "hang out" with him and his friend. They need someone to ridicule to make themselves feel better. Jerks -- simple as that.
In any event, Don is moving, though it's a few months away.
Just my opinion....